Part of my new journey involves Noom, an app aimed at helping millennials enjoy a healthier lifestyle. I’ve registered on the app, set up my account, met my coach, and thrown myself into the experience, which involves motivational content, challenges, group content, and a great meal tracking system. I’m only on day six of my membership with them and I absolutely, wholeheartedly love this tool.

For me personally, Noom is amazing because it’s a very structured system that’s been cleverly laid out to draw users gently into it, rather than overwhelm them from the get-go. They don’t inundate you with requests for information on the first day, instead they ease you into it, and pepper the information hunting with tips and hints about how to get more out of the app. In the past, when I’ve tried apps like MyFitnessPal, the stark layout just made me feel blah about the whole thing, as though the entire process is work. And as much as I love a good graph, actually using one to document how I am doing just leaves me feeling way too over-confident on good days, and ready to give up on bad days. This kind of gentle, yet thorough, induction to a healthier lifestyle suits me perfectly for the place that I am in my life, but I can see how it would also be really flexible and accommodating for people in a majority of situations. It’s non-invasive and feels friendly.

As much as I am enjoying Noom, and feeling like I’m getting a lot out of it already, I felt compelled to write about it today because my lovely coach asked me a really difficult question earlier this week and I wanted to share my answer. It went like this:

Coach: Can you list 10 barriers that are preventing you from achieving your goal weight?

Me: Hi <Coach>, 10 might be hard but I’ll give it a go! 1. Chronic illness makes it hard for me to go to places that are loud, hot, or brightly lit and I’m uncomfortable around strangers now. 2. I’m lazy and I always put it off. 3. When I don’t put it off I stick to it for a couple of weeks, cheat, hate myself and give up. 4. A lot of my eating problems come from my dad and he makes me feel so bad about myself so often that I don’t feel like I’m worth working on. 5. I’m fixated on losing weight FAST and if I don’t get the results I want, I give up. 6. I’m scared that I can’t do it and I’ll fail. 7. I don’t have diabetes or sleep apnea so I can fool myself into thinking it’s not as bad as it is. 8. I’m very addicted to food. 9. I don’t want to get thin and then have to live on salads forever. I haven’t reached that point yet where I’m ready to ‘breakup’ with food. 10. What if I reach my goal weight and all the things I hate about myself are still there? What if I’m still ugly? What if nobody wants me?

Again, with the over sharing, K…

But in all seriousness, this is how I feel and opening up about it has, I think, been pretty beneficial. This conversation between me and my coach happened before I went to see my new therapist yesterday, and having made this list already gave me a great jumping off point for things I wanted to work through immediately. Issues with my dad, for example…

I’ve felt shame for years about that the things in my head that I think/feel about myself. I still feel shame about them. But being ashamed, and hiding the fact that I am struggling and can’t save myself, is only damaging me, and the support and reception I’ve received from the people I’ve opened up to by now has shown me that I don’t need to be so apprehensive. I don’t want the end goal of this project to just be that I lose weight, because the weight is a (very large) part but not the whole. To me, this journey is something I am doing to change my life, so much so that I feel that it’s worth repeating. I am trying to change my life, not just my waistline.

I’m grateful that I’m making this journey at a time when tools like Noom and competent therapists are easy to find, access, and utilise, and I hope I can continue this upwards momentum. Until tomorrow!

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